Thursday, April 30, 2009


Musicians and actors have been doing public service announcements in the USA for decades. What would be interesting is creating public service announcements (PSA) based on song lyrics. There have been great lyrics down through the decades that would do good service for these PSAs, but since we all have short attention spans now, let's not go too far back.

From the 1960s and 1970s:

  • From the band Sweet we're taught that love is like oxygen. Here's the PSA: "Love is like oxygen so don't smoke in bed!"

  • The Beatles sang "All you need is love". Here's the PSA: "All you need is love, but handwashing is still the single most important way to stop the spread of infection."

From the 1980s (The voice of this princess' mother, The Queen is loud and clear here. Readers better heed! Does French & Italian spitfire raise any images?):

  • Elvis Costello sang "what's so funny about peace, love, and understanding?". Here's the PSA: "What's so funny about peace, love, and understanding? Nothing and you won't find it funny when a heart attack comes knocking so trash the constant burger and fries!"

  • Cyndi Lauper sang "girls just wanna have fun". Here's the PSA: "Girls just wanna have fun but people are starving in Africa so eat your lima beans!"

From the 1990s:

  • Pearl Jam sang "Jeremy spoke in class today". Here's the PSA: "Jeremy spoke in class today. While this is fascinating news, please be quiet and courteous while in the library."

  • Nirvana sang "Here we are now - entertain us!" Here's the PSA: "Here we are now - entertain us! And we hope you'll entertain the idea of reducing, reusing, and recycling!"

According to here are some current hit songs:

  • From "Boom Boom Pow" The Black Eyed Peas sing "I'm so 3008/You so 2000 and late". Here's the PSA: "I'm so 3008. You so 2000 and late so get back to the future and keep your ladders away from electrical lines!"

  • In his country hit, " Don't Think I Can't Love You", Jake Owen sings, surprisingly enough "Oh, but baby, baby, oh baby, don't think I can't love you". Here's the PSA: "Oh, but baby, baby, oh baby, don't think I can't love you, but I can't get get my arms around you so please start eating 5 a day of fruits and veggies!"
  • In Beyonce's dance single, "Halo" she sings "Remember those walls I built well baby they're tumbling down". Here's the PSA: "Remember those walls I built? Well baby they're tumbling down because I didn't hire a licensed contractor. Get the job done right!"

Fun with song lyrics and PSAs in this life, the Universe, and everything. What other interesting concoctions can be thought up next?

Wednesday, April 29, 2009


Humans and their motives always interest me in this life, the Universe, and everything. I was driving down the street (yes this princess loves to drive!) and noticed an interesting side street name. Then I looked down that street which dipped into a little valley and I saw the most interesting thing of all. It was "JESUS" painted in red letters on the roof of a house.

I thought I wonder why the owners did this? Were they in angry? Hey, red is a symbol of strong emotion and usually it's anger. They might be so angry they felt the need to express their anger thus.

Or maybe it was an attention getter. The roof is facing the sky after all. Maybe they wanted Jesus to see it from Heaven. Maybe Jesus will think They LIKE me! They really LIKE me!! This may be the painters' desired result. They may have even hired a marketing specialist who recommended painting as a tie-in to the construction trade so the big J would be pleased. He was a carpenter after all. The big J may even put in a good word for the painters with the big G. Hey, every little bit helps.

Or maybe the owners decided they needed to maintain their penmanship skills, and the roof with Jesus in red paint was as good a way as any. One always benefits from penmanship practice. The letters were in good shape and proportional. Actually, they looked perfect all in capital letters. I think Jesus would approve and they'll get another good mark on their celestial scorecard.

Or maybe they just like the name Jesus and wanted to recommend it via the rooftop method to expectant parents. Instead of shouting it from the rooftop they figured they'd paint it on the rooftop to keep their voices from getting hoarse. Being house painters they're probably quite practically minded that way.

So I will wonder on about the impetus that propelled these purveyors of paint to express themselves so. Isn't it interesting what we can do and why with a bucket of red paint? The special effects guys from the movie Carrie (based on the Stephen King novel of the same title) may concur!

Tuesday, April 28, 2009


I've had some strange people calling the house lately. I'm so glad I have caller ID to save me from dealing directly with these people. I mean really now! Who in their right mind would name their kid "Toll Free Number"?! That's just downright cruel. The teasing that poor person had to endure as a child must've been horrendous. Despite my empathy it doesn't endear me to talking to the poor wretch. How do I know if this person is of sound mind - especially if he went through horrible childhood teasing or bullying? One never knows with people who have odd names. Can they really be trusted? I think not. I know Shakespeare says that a rose by any other name smells as sweet, but he never met "Toll Free Number" either!

Come to think of it, how does a person know if someone else is trustworthy? Certain names definitely don't lend themselves to confidence in certain contexts (See Post #10: Also, we know there is one certain common sense measure of trustworthiness or lack thereof: beady eyes-the very first sign of untrustworthiness we are taught! Beware the beady-eyed man! And of course there's the "trust your gut" tool many humans use.

To trust or not to trust? Are there other factors that do or don't instill a sense of trust? Since the Internet has all the answers, I think this princess will seek and find. Here are some results:

  • Our bones will tell a story! This is an actual search option: "traits that can be gleaned from a person's skeletal remains". So good bone structure = trustworthy person? Cool! Now we have a telltale sign in addition to a good stable name.
  • Look what else Google coughed up: two separate studies where people were rated on their trustworthiness and creditworthiness based on facial features! There's something to the beady eye thing! Actually they look at the eyebrows and mouth more. It seems an angry face doesn't appear too trustworthy. Imagine that! And as far as the creditworthiness goes, people were able to accurately predict who'd pay back their loan based on a picture of the person. So we can throw out the credit scores now! Hopefully they don't look at this princess' passport photo for evidence!

Thankfully we don't have to do a taste test on each other to find out. We don't have to resort to the kitty cat butt sniff test either! We have the Internet, our eyes, and our gut. What more could a human ask for in this life, the Universe, and everything?

Thursday, April 23, 2009


Someone once said "Idle hands are the Devils' workshop". Well, what about other unused body parts? Could humans get into trouble if they had inactivity elsewhere? How would we label and categorize these issues?

Would a woman who's causing problems at the office due to unrelieved sexual tension have "cootchie cooldown"? Should they categorize it more technically and call it "quiescent cootchie"? Would a man doing the same have a "jobless johnson"?

It's been said that intelligent teens who don't get enough mental activity or stimulation can become underachievers. So would all that potential go down the "brain drain"? And would a group of these indolent intellects be a "busted brain trust"?

And what about those unused gluts? What if a chair fit so snugly that when a person stood up it defied gravity and came along for the ride? Did the chair get a "butt hug" or was it a "gross weight embrace"? What does one call this situation besides embarrassing?

It seems that idle hands aren't the only things that can make life interesting in this life, the Universe, and everything. It's time to move it or lose it or suffer (or enjoy as the case may be) the consequences.


Funny things. Some things sound funny - like the word "wienerschnitzel" or "wenis", the Latin word for the patch of rough skin on the outside of the elbow. Some things look funny - like duck-billed platypi, octupi, and a Cyclops' eye. Funny things happen on the way to somewhere - the forum, the market, or the Rolling Stones' 19th Nervous Breakdown. They can be funny in the humorous context or funny in the strangely weird context. So maybe what strikes us is truly dependent on context - our own (perspective, personality, or fatigue state) or the interplay of elements in an external situation.

Due to the power of the World Wide Web, I found some contextual funny:

  • Doctor Slaughter (I bet the patients are flockin' like lambs led!)

  • Doctor Doolittle in human medicine (Didn't he know he could talk to the animals?)

  • Doctor Love (Do they really call him that?)

  • A doctor who works for Bluff City Medical Center (Is he telling me the truth about my diagnosis?)

I think I'm going to change my name to Ima Princess. I like the sound of that!

Thankfully there's no need to discuss feeling funny or things that taste funny. What's the fun in that?

Tuesday, April 21, 2009


What if I were to abdicate my princess throne and become a prophet? It wouldn't be a lateral move according to stories I read growing up. The Judeo-Christian prophets didn't fare well at all. Either their audience wasn't listening or the ruling class was and they usually didn't like what they heard. Those rulers weren't a patient lot! Yeah, death isn't on my agenda for things to do today. Cassandra of Greek mythology didn't have a good time of it either. She failed to return Apollo's love so he cursed her gift of prophecy: no one would believe her predictions. Thankfully I'll only be a hypothetical prophet. What would my modern day prophecy be like compared to some seekers and speakers of old? How would the old wisdom apply in this day and age?


THEN: The prophet John the Baptist (c. 6-2 BCE - 30 CE) is he who was spoken of through the prophet Isaiah:

A voice of one calling in the desert, 'Prepare the way for the Lord, make straight paths for him.'

NOW: I'd call out too if only the desert had cell phone reception!

THEN: Jalal ad-Din Rumi (1207 - 1273), Persian poet, theologian, and mystic:

"Your task is not to seek for love, but merely to seek and find all the barriers within yourself that you have built against it."

NOW: I hear ya, Rumi! If only I'd overcome my inertia and take that online course "how to upload a photo". I could post to a website for Internet dating and have it made in the shade! (Or is that makin' it in the shade?)

THEN: Samuel Johnson (September 18, 1709 - December 13, 1784), English author, poet, essayist, moralist, novelist, literary critic, biographer, editor, and lexicographer (he was busy!):

"Some desire is necessary to keep life in motion."

NOW: This man obviously never worried about getting lost in life. My version would be "Some desire, mapquest, and a GPS are necessary to keep life in motion." Otherwise I'd be stranded out in the desert with no cell phone reception.

THEN: Yiddish proverb on marriage: "Every pot will find its lid."

NOW: They haven't seen my kitchen!

These are some thoughts on wisdom through the ages in this life, the Universe, and everything. Good thing I have no plans to make the job change!

Tuesday, April 14, 2009

This princess has always wondered about life, it's meaning, how it all works and so on. One intriguing thing is what happens after we die. I have a few questions: Is it really that much different in the new space or state of being? What are some things to consider about beliefs humans hold?

Certain near death experiences (NDE) discuss meeting relatives who have passed away. What if the dying person doesn't want to meet a relative or two? What if he'd be happy spending eternity without said relative? Think about it...who's to say anything would change just because of the new move? Eternal quarrels, sibling rivalry, or endless parental nagging? Is that really in the eternal rewards plan? Maybe the Universe Maker could get tips from Citibank or Discover card.

I've also read NDE stories where people report "knowing everything" once they get to the other side. I already know people on this side who think they know everything so nothing's changed there.

What about the belief "you die, go in the ground, and that's it"? Yeah, that sounds like fun.

Then there's the reincarnation gig. My question: if someone heads back to Earth who's gonna be there to meet and torment the newcomers (see above meeting relatives example)?

This princess vaguely remembers the Catholic concepts of limbo, purgatory, and hell, which really just sound like varying versions of jail time. If you're an unbaptized baby who dies you get to go to limbo, hang out, and be bored. No punishment there so it's probably like a pre-release center here on Earth. For somewhat bad behavior you get to do a finite amount of time with punishment in purgatory. Sounds like a short jail sentence to me. For really bad behavior there's hell and there's no gettin' out of it. That sounds like life in prison with no parole. Yeah, good times.

So many beliefs, so little time for a princess to consider in this life, the Universe, and everything. She feels another possible blog post coming on. Stay tuned.

Monday, April 6, 2009


Except for the butterflies in my stomach, I don't feel so funny today. The word "funny" has "fun" as its root and "possible" origins of the word "fun" are "fon"- to make a fool of; Middle English "fonnen"- to fool; "fonne"- fool; and, the Celtic "fonn" - pleasure.

Are we having fun in America right now? The economy doesn't seem so funny right now, but isn't laughter free besides being the best medicine?

So let's attempt to raise the fun quotient with a joke:

Why did the funny man cross the road?

  • He was dodging tomatoes torpedoed by an angry audience

  • He thought he'd find a joke there

  • The psychic medium, John Edward told him he could cross over to the Other Side

So maybe that was a failed attempt. I may have possibly lowered the fun quotient. Hopefully it felt a little better than being attacked by a band of ninjas!

So there it is! Brief thoughts offered on fun and funny in this life, the Universe, and everything.

Friday, April 3, 2009


Ever notice how a well placed or misplaced word can make or break a sentence? Obviously humans use words frequently as a means of expression. Some very funny things can happen when they intentionally or unintentionally swap words, add a word, forget a word, or pull a Freudian slip. Of course, comedians intentionally play with words to create humor. One interesting collection of words this princess enjoys and finds amusing are fortune cookies. The following prepositional phrases will be added to some real fortune cookies for amusement
(disclaimer: no fortunes will be harmed in the making of this post...or will they?):

  • under water

  • at the zoo

  • in your face

  • up a tree

So let's mix it up and have some playful fun. The following combo fortunes are created by attaching the phrases as fortunes are pulled out of the fortune cookie jar:

You will show what you are capable of under water.

Depart not from the path which fate has you assigned at the zoo.

You will have gold pieces by the bushel in your face.

Share your enthusiasm - it will prove infectious up a tree.

One who does nothing but wait for his ship to come has already missed the boat under water.

Birds are entangled by their feet and men by their tongues at the zoo.

The physician heals, nature makes well in your face.

You will pass a difficult test that will make you happier up a tree.

You will be proud in manner, but tolerant and generous under water.

Answer just what your heart prompts you at the zoo.

You are deeply attached to your family and home in your face.

It is better to have a hen tomorrow than an egg today up a tree.

So thus is the mix of merry and mayhem in this life, the Universe, and everything.

Thursday, April 2, 2009


Ever notice how most cats could care less if their owner lived or breathed just as long as said owner fed them on time? Though I've owned some wonderfully enjoyable cats I must admit my fondest memories are of our family dogs: Bertha, our St. Bernard who was so gentle pigeons roosted on her head; Lady, our malamute husky who rough housed with us; and, Trouble, our mischievous Samoyed/Malamute mix who had a white coat and black bandit mask. Our favorite game: Trouble stole our mittens when my brothers and I tobogganed. At first we chased him, which he thought was great fun. Then we pretended to faint and fall on our backs in the snow. He'd run over, drop the mitten, and lick our face. We'd snatch our mitten back and laugh. He was also my jogging partner and a princess' best friend. So in light of all the fun, love, service, and loyalty our dogs bring us, I share a little dog humor (no not a Chihuahua) that has come to play in my court...and I can see it's little tail wagging now (it's a Staffordshire Bull Terrier):

Why did the dog cross the road?

Choose all that apply:
  • He was bored playing "Fetch"
  • His owner had the keys to the Ferrari
  • How else was he gonna reach Fifi who's in heat?

Why did the dog chase the cat?

Choose all that apply:

  • It's much more fun than playing "Fetch"
  • The owner still has the keys to the Ferrari
  • Fifi rejected him

So there it is. A "little" dog humor for the owners who enjoy dogs in this life, the Universe, and everything.

Wednesday, April 1, 2009


This is my conversation with God:

Are you there Infinite Intelligence? It's me comicprincess. Do you have a few minutes? Oh yeah, silly me, I have an eternity. Mind if I call you God so there's less typing for me? Right...a rose by any other name smells as sweet.

Well now that we have that cleared up, I have some questions for you since you are the Source after all. Here's the thing: we all know the Beatles sang, "All you need is love"; and, I saw this really cool bumper sticker that reads "Life is the school. Love is the lesson"; and, then, of course, there's the Golden Rule: "do unto others as you would have them do unto you" aka "Love your neighbor as yourself". I want to understand all this in more practical terms. I have some interview questions for Your Great Magnificence and I'll just post them Q&A Style as we go.

CP: How can we learn to love ourselves, love our neighbors, heal ourselves, and heal our planet? I already work 40 hours a week. I don't know if I have time for all this.

G: "Day by day...Day by Day"

CP: I heard that song on the oldies radio station. So we're learning, loving, and healing each day. How is this possible?

G: "Love lifts us up where we belong, where the eagles cry on a mountain high."

CP: So Joe Cocker tuned in and tells us love is lifting us up. That's great, but it doesn't answer my question. How do we know HOW to do this loving our neighbors as ourselves thing? How do we get from Point A to Point B?

G: "Sign, sign, everywhere a sign"

CP: Hey the Five Man Electrical Band sang that-another oldie but goodie. So if we pay attention you give us signs and point the way? That's oh so very cool! This raises another question. What if we miss the signs and fail? I've driven past more than my share of exit signs. I've also gone the wrong way and gotten totally lost!

G: "I'll be there to always see you through. I'll be there to love and comfort you."

CP: The Four Tops sang that. Boy you sure love oldies! How will we know you're there?

G: "It's time we stop, children, what's that sound? Everybody look what's goin' down."

CP: It sounds like Buffalo Springfield knows how to "stop, look, and listen" just like when we cross the street. So if we get quiet and listen we'll get it. Is there anything else?

G: "Whenever you call me, I'll be there"

CP: So the Spinners knew that asking for help through prayer is a good thing too. Nice! Before my last question here's my recap: we are learning, loving, and healing daily. Love lifts us and energizes us. You're always pointing the way. There's no such thing as failure because you're always sending love and wisdom through synchronicity. All we need to do is take time to "stop, look, and listen" not only in our quiet times, but throughout the day through words spoken, written, or sung; gestures of kindness and otherwise; and, the ugly and beautiful images in nature, art, and photography. I'm beginning to understand. Any more song lyrics of wisdom?

G: "Take the time to get to know me. If you want me why can't you just show me?"

CP: Oh so very cool! You like modern rock too! Sweet!! I love Cake! They're an awesome band! So it's important to give too. As we give we receive and vice versa. The perfect circle continues. As we love our neighbor we love ourselves. Thanks very much for your time God. Speaking of time, I've gotta run. You know -dishes to do, reports to write, and so on. You know - daily living in this life, the Universe, and everything. Don't worry though. The radio is on and I'm listening.